Jess Picken, Senior Pastor C3 Toronto
I’ll let you in on a little secret.
95% of the time, I have no idea what I’m doing… and the 5% of the time I think I know, I realize pretty quickly that I was wrong.
I have now been in ministry for over 10 years and, although I may “know” more and have experienced more, I still wake up every day with the thoughts, ‘What am I doing?’, ‘How are we going to get through this?’, ‘This is too much,’ and, ‘Jesus give me wisdom.’
In this world of social media, we have incredible access to hear many people share profound statements and revelations in preaches, panels, podcasts, posts, etc. This access is an unbelievable blessing, but if we’re not careful we can think these people “know what they’re doing” and disqualify ourselves.
I know because I’ve done it, way too many times. I may seem as though I “have it all together”, but trust me, I have no idea what I’m doing.
I’ve silenced my own voice for fear of not saying the right thing.
I’ve not reached out to someone for fear that I wouldn’t do it the “right way”.
I’ve not prayed for someone for fear of them not feeling God strongly enough.
I thought that I should know what I’m doing by now.
But the Bible is full of people who have no idea what they’re doing. I love Peter because not only did he say the wrong thing multiple times, which I can relate to, but he gives us a beautiful symbolic picture of how I believe we’re meant to live. Walking on water. Leading when he has no idea what he’s doing. Walking in a way that makes no sense. Walking in full dependence on Jesus.
Sam and I want to live our lives in such a way that we become more comfortable out on the water than in the boat. We want to be more comfortable in full dependence on Jesus and uncomfortable when we are depending on ourselves. More comfortable when things don’t make sense than when we have everything under control. When we feel like we’ve got too much control, we purposefully do something to put us back out on the water.
We’ve done this in different ways at different times. Sometimes we’ve given large amounts just to put ourselves back in the unknown. Not because God asked us to, but because we wanted to tangibly release control and put our full dependence back on Christ.
We don’t need to wait for Jesus to ask us. It’s an open invitation. We can make a decision to step out for Jesus without him having to ask. Jesus didn’t ask Peter to walk on water, Peter initiated. The invitation is always there so why not step out?
Maybe you’ve disqualified yourself like I had. Maybe you’re scared of the unknown. Maybe you’ve stepped out before and needed to be rescued so you’d prefer to not experience that again. Maybe you’ve stepped out before but what was unknown last week now makes sense so you’ve found yourself back in the boat without even realizing it.
Whatever the reason, can I encourage you to step out?
Step into the “Jesus I have no idea what I’m doing” zone.
Do the tangible thing; give that money to the church, step up into a greater serving capacity, ask that leader what advice they have for you and actually do it.
And if you are reading this thinking, ‘Jesus I have no idea what I’m doing,’ then keep doing it. Don’t stop! Keep your dependence on him and see how he continues to move in miraculous ways through your life.
To find out more about C3 Toronto, visit c3toronto.com.